My midlife crisis started around age 25. While my friends went to the bars, I preferred to gaze into a fire pit in our backyard pondering how to find a job I loved, the place I wanted to live, and the right partner to enjoy life with. My friends thought I was depressed but I was just intent on figuring it all out.

I decided I needed a change of scenery so I took a job transfer from Boston to Arizona sight unseen and shortly thereafter I met my now wife. We moved back to Chicago together where I landed a financial planning job. 

When I was 29, I was laid off from that financial planning job in the midst of the Great Recession, started my own financial planning practice, and got married.

Fast forward eleven years, two wonderful daughters, and a house later and I find myself celebrating my 40th birthday (just in case you were wondering where the inspiration for today’s post came from!)

It’s been a long, exciting, strange, and wonderful journey so far. Despite all the highs and lows and bumps and bruises along the way, I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Whether you’ve already had your own midlife crisis or find yourself in the middle of one right now, here's a quick summation of what I’ve learned as I reflect on my journey to date:

Life often laughs at our best laid plans but if we can accept this reality and adjust as our lives change, we get to enjoy the journey, not just our destination.

One day we might wake up and realize we’re not where we want to be in our lives. It’s easy to wallow in that realization thinking that it’s too late for us to change. Or we can ask ourselves this potentially life altering question instead:

Will we allow our lives to be defined by what happens to us — or what we choose to make of it?

This is how we can flip the script on whatever curveball life throws our way. When our lives become about what we make of them, the present moment is all that matters. And the only thing we truly control in this moment – or any moment! – are our own actions.

Life is too short to waste on self-limiting beliefs. Lucky for us, we don’t have to wait for a midlife crisis to take control of our actions – financial and otherwise – and make the most of it.

Get updates like this one delivered straight to your inbox. Subscribe to my e-newsletter right here.